Combating Arbitrary Randomness

One of the reasons I enjoy writing this blog so much is that, while its focus is style and fashion, I can talk about these subjects from my own, personal perspective.  And sometimes I can talk about tangential subjects from my personal perspective – like when I ranted about the weird fascination with Viola Davis’ natural hair at the Oscars or that racist moron at French Elle.

So, yeah, I have another rant.

Yesterday my company hosted a wellness fair for its employees and I visited the table of one of the vendors, a national fitness center chain.  The “senior trainer” behind the table asked me about my fitness goals and I gave him the Cliff’s Notes version of my athletic endeavors.

Mr. “Senior Trainer” offered to do a body composition test, after which he informed me that in order for me to have an optimal body fat percentage, “better muscle definition” and to be more competitive, my ideal weight is 15 pounds less than what it is.  What.  The.  Hell?

1)   He’s not a doctor or nutritionist.  More to the point, he’s not MY doctor or nutritionist.

2)   He admitted he doesn’t know much about triathlon or distance running so how can he have any idea what would make me more competitive in either?

3)   Kiss my entire ass.  It’s a valid point.

As a representative of my company, I wanted to be respectful, which I was.  I thanked him for the test and moved on.

But I have to tell you, as confident as I am that I’m right where I need to be, he found the chink in my armor.   The tiniest little seed of doubt found its way into my psyche, and had me questioning how I feel in my own skin.

And that’s the part of this little tale that makes me the angriest because I know better.  How do I not let the arbitrary pronouncement of a random stranger affect how I feel about myself?

If you’ve got suggestions, I’m all ears.


About Felicia Biggins

I'm a fashion blogger and owner of The New Black, a personal styling business, in Austin TX. Follow me on Twitter: @fbigg.
This entry was posted in IMHO and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

17 Responses to Combating Arbitrary Randomness

  1. Elizabeth says:

    I want the answer to that myself! I will say there is no where on that fantastic body of yours for 15 lbs to come from. You would be a walking skeleton and no one wants that. You look fantastic.

    • Thank you, my dear Bess. It was the fact that this person, who doesn’t know me or my life, had the ability to make me doubt what I know is true that really bothers me. I’m not as confident as I thought I was.

  2. Erin says:

    Sorry that happened to you. My guess is that he gives a similar version of that speech to everyone that walks by. He has to persuade people they need the product he’s selling. And preying on people’s insecurities can be a great sales tactic, you know? (After all, it IS what the entire beauty industry is predicated on.) You look great. And if you feel great and are running freaking MARATHONS, you can ignore him.

  3. You look fantastic just the way you are. AND you have ALWAYS looked fantastic!

  4. As Erik would say, “What a tool !”

  5. Maggie S. says:

    Why do we do it? I just don’t know.
    In other news: I can’t wait to tell someone to ‘kiss my entire ass’.

  6. “It’s none of your business what others think of you.”

    I tell myself that everyday.

    If “I’M” happy with me…then that’s all that matters. I figure if I try to please one, the next one will suggest a different hairstyle, then the next one will think I could use different makeup, then the next one will tell me about a better car, and the cycle will never end.

    And I’ll be wearing MY ENTIRE ASS out trying to please everyone else. When I was perfectly happy with me from the start.

    (I think you’re pretty rockin’ myself.)

  7. Karen "Underdog" Underwood says:

    1) his goal on that day was to sell memberships

    2) his goal on that day was to sell memberships

    3) his goal on that day was to sell memberships

    • Hahaha! OK, Underdog, message received. 🙂

    • Karen "Underdog" Underwood says:

      Which means that seed of doubt is something to dismiss. I totally understand, though. But, then again, what the measuring stick he used for “optimal” if he does not know about triathlon?? Criteria for someone who wants a run only focus is very different from someone who wants a triathlon focus. Yadeeyadeeya…bottom line is that yoy have worked very hard to get to where you are today and you look freakin awesome and it shows in your eyes and your face and your laugh that you are exactly where you should be. Wait, did I mention … his goal on that day was to sell memberships

  8. Pingback: 1 Dress, 3 Spring/Summer Trends | The New Black

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